Bob Goff, New York Times bestselling author of Love Does, joins host, Kristen Ivy, to talk about his latest book, Everybody Always, and how showing immense patience can help us — and our kids — love others well.
- Remember love is a sacrifice and commitment. Showing love to those who make it difficult on us is no easy thing. And if it’s your kids, it doesn’t make it any easier, but it makes the duty to show love even stronger. Remind yourself why you’re doing it — you’re showing them who God is through your love for them.
- Instead of telling kids what to do, tell them who they are. There is no such thing as too much affirmation. Whatever your child believes about himself or herself is ultimately who they’ll become. Pour positivity into your child every chance you get.
- Be present. The best way to show your kids how crazy you are about them is to be present. Be all in when you’re with them. Let them know they are a priority to you.
- Surround your kids with community. Introduce your kids to your friends and start establishing with them the relationships that will help them be the best version of themselves.
There are some people who just rub you the wrong way, right? And since this is a safe space, let’s go ahead and admit one thing right now: Sometimes those people who get under our skin the most are the ones who call us mom and dad.
Our job as parents is to impart on our kids different life lessons that will help them become honest, kind, and hardworking people as they continue to grow older. The main lesson, though? Bob Goff says it’s to teach our kids to show immense patience to everyone, especially those we deem annoying at best, unlovable at worst. And it’s a lesson we as parents need to learn, too.
How to love when it’s difficult
It’s human nature to avoid people who make us feel uncomfortable, but Bob encourages us to give those people a second look. Those people, Bob says, aren’t really who they seem, but rather are reacting to an insecurity they have. It’s these people who deserve our patience, especially our kids.
“One of the things I noticed about Jesus is He’s always seeing who people are becoming, not who they used to be,” Bob shares.
The key, then, is to focus on affirming your kids because who they listen to will ultimately be whom they turn out to be. Of course, this isn’t easy — especially when your kid doesn’t seem to be listening to a word you say. The secret: Be consistent and be present.
This is just the beginning of all the insightful knowledge Bob has to share. Hear even more helpful pieces of wisdom by tuning in to today’s episode!
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Bob calls himself a “recovering lawyer” because after practicing law for 25 years, then becoming the Hon. Consul to Uganda, he gave up his law firm to pursue writing and speaking full time. The best part has been connecting with so many people who are on a terrific adventure as well.
Carlos is an author, speaker, and content creator living in Nashville, TN with his wife Heather and 3 kids Sohaila, Seanna, and Losiah. He is addicted to social media, his wife’s enchiladas, and is determined to have his daughters teach him to land a backflip on the trampoline by the time he is 45.
Kristen is the Executive Director of Messaging at Orange, Director of The Phase Project, and co-author of Playing For Keeps and It’s Just a Phase – So Don’t Miss It. She combines her degree in secondary education with a Master of Divinity and lives with her husband, Matt, and their three children, Sawyer, Hensley, and Raleigh, in Cumming, GA.
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