One of the leading causes of “mom guilt” is thinking that you can get it all done.
Instead of setting reasonable expectations, society often puts pressure on moms to be perfect. You just have to work full time, make amazing organic meals for your family, raise talented children and have a wonderful marriage. You also have to stay in shape, dress perfectly and keep a clean house.
Only it is. Moms across the country feel shame when they’re unable to get it all done.
Well, I have some news.
You can’t get it all done.
In fact, on most days, you won’t even get most of it done. But that’s OK, you’re really not supposed to. There are a lot of things you don’t have to do.
But what about the important things you must focus on? How do you accomplish those during a busy season?
One of the big time sucks for Lisa Scheffler, a busy mom who is passionate about goal setting, is home activities. Cooking meals and doing the laundry for her family takes up a lot of time, but those are things she can’t cut. She can’t get focused on a goal and say, “Hey, kids, we’re not going to be eating dinner this week. Good luck foraging for sustenance. Don’t forget, most hipsters have pretty good gardens full of superfoods.”
Instead, she makes “simple meals that don’t take a lot of time.” And “laundry gets clean but not folded and put away, so we’re a wrinkled family for a few days right before a deadline.”
I love that idea. I can just see her kids all wrinkled at school and a teacher saying, “What’s your mom working on this week?” And the kids know it’s a big week when they see hot dogs on the table, or better yet, pizza rolls.
Fortunately, the world is more than happy to help you simplify. Staying with the food example because most of us have to eat, grocery stores now allow you to order online and pick up at the store. My wife buys 75 percent of the same things every trip. During a stressful season, she could place an order from the comfort of home, pull up, and have them place the groceries right into our trunk without even getting out of the car.
Life is too complicated for us to just say no to everything. That’s fine. It’s not realistic to think you can drop everything.
For situations where no isn’t an option, write a “simplify list” and identify the wrinkled-shirt moments you’ll be all right with in your life.
You have some meals that could be simple.
You have some things that can wait.