Just You and Me
Carving out consistent one-on-one time with your kids is one of the best ways to stay in your child’s life. Your child wants a unique connection to you. They want to feel uniquely understood and valued. One-on-one time creates space for this to happen. Now, if you...
What Makes You Kinder?
I had an 'aha' moment a few years ago. It was many years in the making, so let me save you some years and frustration if I can. In fact, let's share our collective wisdom and save us all some heartache. I doubt that there's a single parent who doesn't agree that...
Beyond the Status Quo
I have this reluctant realization in my life... I usually only change when the pain of the status quo is greater than the pain associated with change. I wish it wasn't so, but think about it... might that also be true of you? You want to get thinner or work out, but...
What Endures
I love new year's resolutions, but some of them have melted away by now. And if not, give it till June. Most resolutions get broken or only partially realized. I'm not saying we never change, but tell me if this isn't true: We often judge ourselves by our...
Counting Christmases
We've developed some Christmas traditions over the years. My wife Toni makes a gingerbread house with the kids and bakes candy cane cookies. I always read the Christmas story with the kids before we open any gifts Christmas morning. Plus we eat gourmet chocolate...
Losing Control of Your Teen
None of us likes to be controlled, but there's something inside almost every parent that's a little controlling. When my kids were toddlers, I thought I would forever be able to engineer outcomes. I had some success in getting them to bed on time, making them clean...
Catch Them If You Can
I almost didn't take this picture. I was coming home from dropping off my son at school when I saw how gorgeous the morning light was. I didn't have my camera kit with me. All I had with was my phone. You know how the internal dialogue goes. "Don't bother...
With All Your Mind
Everyone struggles with feelings. We don't feel like getting off the couch, eating healthier or putting the kids in bed on time, so often we don't. Worse, families dissolve every day because parents just don't feel like they are in love anymore. We live in an...
The Freedom to Be Wrong
(Photo by Andrew Balet. Used with permission.) I remember walking through this laboratory of Thomas Edison as a child. (It's been painstakingly preserved outside Detroit Michigan.) It's the room where the lightbulb, phonograph and thousands of other things were...
Less Time . . . More Influence
I still remember the first day of kindergarten for both of my sons so very clearly, like it was yesterday. But right now, we're preparing for two new firsts a few weeks from now. My eldest son starts his first year of college and my younger son begins his first year...
The Church & Every Parent's Desire for Help
When we talk about parents finding partners to help them parent beyond their capacity, we are drawn again and again to the church. That's at the heart of the Orange vision...the color red represents the heart of family, while the color yellow represents the light of...
How (Not) to Fail at Communication
Conflict is messy, but if you live in a family, it's also inevitable. Experience shows that most of us approach it one of two ways. Some of us feel so threatened by conflict that we decide to ignore it. Your pre-teen misses a curfew...you decide the drama isn't...