Author: Carey Nieuwhof

A Story Worth Telling

Everybody loves a story with a great plot line. We applaud the hero, sitting mesmerized at the edge of our seat while good battles evil, or while right struggles with wrong, hoping for good to win. We cheer when good prevails and even get emotional when the victim gets rescued. Everybody loves a great story. It’s just that few of us want to live it. Every great story involves conflict. Think about the movies you watch and novels you read. When it comes to the story of good versus evil, there is always a struggle. I challenge you to find...

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5 Things You’ll Never Regret

Yes, it really was a bad idea to give your six-year-old access to the finger paints while you did the laundry. Or to let your fourteen-year-old son stay overnight at his friend’s place without triple checking to make sure his parents were home. And maybe it wasn’t all that wise when you had that fight heated conversation in the kitchen when the kids were watching cartoons. We all have regrets. But the flip side is also true. We all have things we’ll never regret doing as a parent. And if you think about doing things you’ll never regret, you can...

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You Are Not Disqualified

Because when you find yourself the villain in the story you have written It’s plain to see That sometimes the best intentions are in need of redemption Would you agree? – Death Cab for Cutie, “You Are a Tourist” So Death Cab for Cutie is a band—just to be clear—one that’s on my playlist a lot these days. As that song played through my earbuds, it hit me that it describes how I sometimes feel about my parenting. No new parent begins by saying, “I hope I mess up my child’s life.” Who ever sets out to be the...

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You Bet Life Isn’t Fair, Kid!

Your kids have likely screamed 862 different versions of “That’s not fair!!!!” from their small lungs before their fifth birthday. Whether it’s the attention you gave her sister but not her, why her friend could get a new Elsa doll but she couldn’t, or why the your son’s friends always get the most update version of Xbox . . . Kids have an inherent radar for fair, which usually means even. Which can also mean “I got a little more.” (Why is it only unfair if someone else got more than you did????) And we haven’t even gotten to...

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Rules or Relationship? A Simple Maxim for Parents

My guess is that in your house—like my house—there’s a constant tension between rules and relationships. Your nine-year-old is supposed to help wash the car, but instead decides that riding his bike is a far more important to the functioning of the universe than cleaning your dirty minivan. How do you respond? On the one hand, you need . . . rules—boundaries, guidelines and limits that make life work and shape character. On the other hand, you need. . . relationships—love for each other, respect and even some basic kindness. But rules and relationships always seem to be in...

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